When I was growing up, there were only two bald-headed men in the world: Yul Brynner and Telly Savalas . It was so rare in those days. But now, it seems like every man is bald, shaving and shining their heads. Even Yul and Telly wouldn’t stoop to having grungy-looking facial hair, but now every man seems to want a little facial hair to complement their golden domes too. This is terrible! I have always done the opposite--keep off the facial hair but keep the turf on top. Still do, even now in middle age. But it would figure that I have to be the one to reach middle age WITH HAIR in a time when it is NOT POPULAR. Who would have known “bald is beautiful” would take over the world just when I should have an advantage. To be honest, I didn’t even try that hard to keep my hair. I used the cheapest shampoo--usually the 99-cent Suave (with a coupon)--and never used conditioner. I wore a baseball cap whenever I wanted (even though I wasn't covering a bald spot), an act that is universall...
by Chris Rainey. This is a blog of my journaling, essays, opinion pieces, religious satire, and creative writing.